Old Age, Youth, And Family Life

Old Age

'Nothing to look backward to with pride,

And nothing to look forward to, with hope.' - Robert Frost.

This is the plight of many, in old age.

Are you old or you think the old age is still far away?

* Old age begins, when we live in our past memories.

If only we could create fresh memories everyday!

Then we don't have to repeat old anecdotes in get-togethers.

* Old age also begins, when we have rigid habits.

Flexibility in views, and habits is an antidote to old age.

Flexibility to tolerate others' views is an antidote to old age.

Pangs of loneliness in old age are omnipresent.

Having played the role, senior citizens are literally waiting for His call.

Society is busy attending the new nurseries.

Pension or old age lollipops degenerate us psychologically.

Let's attempt to play proactively, and contribute positively in the society.

Youth And Long Term Relationships

It is easy to nurture short term friendship.

A honeymoon period, is always sweet.

Trouble begins only in long term relationships.

Familiarity brings in casualness, and in some cases contempt as well.

We divorce and marry again in search of happiness.

Only to divorce again!

Conditional Friendship/Relationship

After decades of friendship, my friend decided to terminate the friendship.

My friend wanted exclusive rights on our friendship.

'My best friend is one, who tries to bring out the best in me.' - Henry Ford.

More often than not, people don't believe in sharing life.

A conditional friendship, is no friendship.

A relationship which manipulates division or isolation within a family is no friendship.

Nagging implies non-stop bombarding the friend, with negative comments, and never appreciating.

A friend encourages as well as corrects, when wrong..

Thus a child loves the mother.

A Possible Solution

* If only we could be a friend to: parents, siblings, spouse, children, grandparents, and grandchildren!

It would cut down loneliness within.

* To 'expect' from others in old age results in being dependent on others.

We are no longer a leader in family affairs.

A leader is always independent, financially, and emotionally.

He/she may provide support to others.

So cut down expectations from others.

* Institutions of marriage and family are inventions of humanity.

We should be proud of our heritage.

These traditions are in danger of extinction,

Just because we are unable to inculcate 'tolerance', and control our ego clashes.

If we love our children, they don't deserve broken homes.

God bless us all.

Harmony at Home - Crucial for Family Development

Harmony at home is a crucial factor if the members of the family wish its development collectively and individually. If the purpose of the family unit is to reproduce, bring up, educate, share and care the off springs, nothing of these could be successful if it loses harmony within. If the home life is a troubled or confused one, in consequence the same would be reflected in the work he does. No self or family development is possible if there is discord and disharmony at home. Harmony between father and mother, parents and off springs and among siblings should prevail in abundance for the development of the family.
Misconception or misunderstanding, lack of communication, forgetting and negligence of individual responsibilities towards each other, selfishness, lack of patience and lack of love are some of the causes for the discord and disharmony at home. Everybody in the family should be aware of his or her duties and responsibilities towards the other. Even Little children should be assigned some of the suitable responsibilities of the family. Expenditures should be according to the revenue. What is expected from one should not be beyond his capacity. In male dominated societies, attempt to reverse the position from father to mother would result in discord and disharmony in the family.
When there is no harmony in the family, in spite of the development, one can see the deterioration in the every aspect of the family. Frequent quarreling between husband and wife, hindrance to children's education, scattered family situation, children becoming victims of the bad society, getting addicted to drugs and alcohol by father and male children of the family, prostitution are some of the bad consequences of the discord and disharmony of the family.
When husband respect the rights of wife and children of the family and when he understands and fulfills his responsibilities for them and when wife also does her part understanding and respecting rights of others in the family, happiness begins to prevail. Children will be happy and they will continue their education successfully and their future will be secured. When there is peace in the family, they have good chance of doing their businesses and their jobs well and thereby their revenues also will increase. When the harmony prevails in the family, the mental and physical health of the members of the family will become favorable. Therefore in conclusion, if a family wishes its development all the members should act in a way that preserve the harmony and peace of it.

The Exchange of Presents Demands Your Presence

The Exchange of Presents Demands your Presence
Tis the season for presents/presence and there is no better time of year to practice both the giving of your heart as well as the giving of your attention.
Have you ever noticed, I mean really truly noticed that when you give a gift to someone you feel as excited and/or nervous to give as the person feels to receive?
There is anxiety: will he/she really like what I chose to give, there is anticipation: Oh I can't wait for him/her to open my gift, there is heart: I really paid attention this year to what he/she said they needed. If you are prone to just hand a gift to someone and allow distraction to take you away from the actual opening of the gift then you are missing out on all the magic of that moment. Being in the present with the person receiving a gift is a gift itself.
Where in your body do you feel this anxiety, anticipation and/or generosity?
In what ways is your energy transferring to those around you?
It's an amazing connection, a coming together moment for the giver and receiver, where synchronicity is so aligned only the uninterrupted presence of awareness in the opening of the gift, the present, could break the bond. It is the height of mindfulness or intentional attention. How many times during the year do we use intentional attention in our daily lives?
"To allow ourselves to be truly in touch with where we already are, no matter where that is, we have got to pause in our experience long enough to let the present moment sink in; long enough to actually feel the present moment, to see it in its fullness, to hold it in awareness and thereby come to know and understand it better."
Jon Kabat-Zinn, Wherever You Go, There You Are
The question is how can we give ourselves the present of presence all the time? It's a magical feeling to be so engrossed in the moment of giving that we don't pay attention to time or space or what comes next. This deep concentration, this deep immersion of presence is called flow and scientists believe that the pathway toward inner peace and happier human beings is through these flow moments where we are so absorbed in the moment we occupy that there is no room for past or future. Author and psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi Ph.D., considered by some to the be the father of the concept of flow, says,
"Flow experiences occur in different ways for each person. Some might experience flow while doing a sport such as running or playing tennis and some might experience flow while playing an instrument. Some people might experience flow in the simple act of giving a gift whether it be an actual gift to unwrap or the act of volunteering and giving of their time and energy."
If you are ever in a situation where you want to get a handle on what is happening in this exact moment, breathe. Practicing presence is as simple as deep breathing. Your breath is always with you and you can stop in the middle of everything you are busy with to take purposeful breaths and calm your brain and your heart and your spirit and create focus and intentional attention.
There are more ways to give yourself the present of presence. Here are a few to take with you in your bag of goodies this holiday season:
"... the concentration is usually possible because the task undertaken has clear goals and provides immediate feedback."
Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
Turn off your thinking mind and tune into your now mind. The health benefits of mastering being in the here and now are significant. According to an article published on an eco institute site "these health benefits include a reduction in stress which we all know reduces the risk for heart disease, lowering blood pressure, reducing recurring pain, and is a boost for our immune system. This boost is accomplished by increasing our antibodies and brain function by our body's response to our thoughts both positive and negative."
You won't be leaving anything important behind if: You let go of old thoughts or let go of what if thoughts. You will however be gaining awareness and color and vibrancy in the moment you occupy by accepting what is happening right this moment and all this moment is giving to you.
Let go of the Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda mindset: Each new moment that presents its gift to you has the ability to be a gift for your heart and soul. Give in to what is being offered by enveloping yourself in the passion, authenticity and energy of now. By letting go of your expectation of what the moment could or should or would bring, allow the moment to unfold in all its organic splendor and guide you.
No Restrictions. In helping my clients set goals and create their own avenues of accountability we create if/then statements. For example: A client wants to lose 10 pounds by the end of the month. The if/then statement might say, "If I feel like having a sugary snack after dinner then I will drink a hot apple cider or munch on an apple instead." In the present or gift of presence this would be the one time when your prepared mind could hinder complete flow of enjoyment. Let go of the if/then thinking and align your mind with the here/now thinking. Notice how much more rich and emotional the here/now mind perceives life in its raw and real time. If/then changes your course and forces you to control the gift of the present which then has the potential to control the outcome. Here/now allows you to just enjoy flow in the moment for what it is without the stress of barriers or diversion.
Sense your way to presence. Play a mind game with yourself by paying attention to each of your senses, one at a time. This activity is great practice for presence and being mindful of the here and now. Pay attention to your breath, carefully watch how your hands touch things, observe what is going on right in front of you, concentrate on the smells all around you and see if you can name them, really dissect the flavors of your next meal, listen carefully when someone is speaking to you and try to detect the many levels of emotion being used in the conversation.
Purposefully create daily moments of presence. Go a different route home from work, eat lunch in a different location or pack a lunch that is different than what you normally eat, skip lunch completely and pamper yourself instead, take your hobby with you wherever you go and work on it at least once during the day away from home, learn something new today and bring it up in conversation. The opportunity for an awe moment is created in being present with intentional attention.
In the winter time I enjoy washing the dishes, even with dish gloves on because I am so comforted by the warm water cuddling my cold hands. It is a daily, year round chore but at this time of year the cold is a stark reminder of the blessing of heat. My appreciation level for warm water and keeping my family healthy soars. I find myself actually looking forward to this chore and instead of washing dishes 3 or 4 times a day to keep up with the mess I let it pile up so that I can spend real time appreciating the warmth. Bizarre, I know, but the presence it creates is magical.

Top Tips For Staying Warm This Winter

In the middle of winter it can get so cold that you start coming up with unique ways of how to cover every part of you so there is not one piece of skin exposed. OK. So, we live in Australia and it doesn't get as cold here as it does in some parts of the world but some of us sorry souls feel the cold in their bones as soon as it drops below 25 degrees and we need a firm strategy on how to stay warm when this happens.
Short of wearing gloves while you're trying to use Instagram on your phone or donning a balaclava at the supermarket to keep your face extremities warm, we've got our top tips to share for staying toasty during the winter months.
Drink hot chocolate and herbal teas
Warming yourself from the inside out is our top tip for winter happiness. A good old-fashioned hot chocolate will warm the spirits and herbal teas come infused with lots of natural, healthy bits and pieces that can help warm and cleanse your interior leaving you feeling fresh and invigorated. Ginger for example is ideal for boosting circulation and is well known for its flu-fighting powers. Peppermint tea is good for the liver and full of antioxidants. There's loads of herbal teas to choose from which promote a healthy body. Take that winter.

Warming yourself from the inside out is our top tip for winter happiness

Get under a really warm blanket
There are some beautiful designs coming out of Australian businesses. Hand woven, geometric throws are not only going to keep you really warm but also add a vibrant spot of colour to your boring old couch. But maybe you want to really take it to the extreme and nothing says 'I'm freezing' more than knitting your own woolly blanket with industrial-sized needles with wool made for giants. Of course, you can also buy a pre-knitted blanket but then you don't get to keep those over-sized knitting needles as a memento of your mad knitting skills.
Buy a hot water bottle
Nana is making a come back (see knitting in previous top tip) and hot water bottles are no exception. These little beauties just need hot water and they will give you hours of love. Speaking of nana, why not get crafty and return your hot water bottles favour by crocheting a cover for extra-pretty and a warm cuddle on the couch. Who needs humans when you can enjoy the company of this less chatty, super warm and well-dressed friend?
Layer up
There's a reason dressing in layers is so popular, because us coldies are donning all our clothes at once in an attempt to buffet winter chills. Thankfully it's a fashion statement but don't overdo it and end up looking like that walking marshmallow-thing at the end of Ghostbusters. Be savvy and choose thermals and woolly tights as your under-garments with items like merino wool over the top. Not too sexy in the undressing sense, but hey, you're warm.

Working out for just a short time each day releases feel-good chemicals which help fight winter blues.

Exercise
It's hard to get motivated to exercise in winter because it's cold outside but you need to see the end goal and the end goal is good! Working out for just a short time each day releases feel-good chemicals which help fight winter blues. Exercising outdoors helps increase the lack of Vitamin D you may be experiencing due to less sunshine. Dress in a thermal and get going quickly. In no time you'll be feeling that burn and repelling the cold. Not only are you now a cold-fighting machine you're also getting a pretty good body in preparation for summer. Yes!
Snuggle
If you decide you do need more than just the hot-hearted company of a water bottle and a little human interaction might actually help with your sanity during the shorter days, then you might as well use this person for extra warmth. Get close, get personal and snuggle your way through winter in the only way two beings generating their own power can. A pet can also work in this capacity - but they may smell more, so up to you.